My parents probably wont pay for summer school.

Chagen

My parents, even if I was failing, which I am, would never pay for summer school. Or take me. Which is really bad, because I'll probably have to go. For this particular six weeks, I am not passing any class with a grade higher than 73. In three classes I have a 39, 40, and 37. I fucked up this year completely. I'm not gonna lie, I did it myself. It was my own choice to go on the computer guitily when I was supposed to be doing homework. Or to play games. Or to flat out do nothing. I hate how lazy I am. I hate how I have this unwarranted self-importance and narcissism and perfectionism that makes me not finish or do work because it's not "perfect enough". I hate how I have to take goddamn pill just so I can focus and get work done. Sigh.....I'm a lazy piece of shit. I'll never succeed in life like this. I'll be one of those guys who always hurting for money, living in a shitty ghetto with a shitty job and a shitty car and shitty everything and I'll look out my window and say "I could have been someone. Now I'm no one." God dammit. If I was ever blessed, God has abandoned me. I'm really depressed right now. My entire life is a monotous drone of screwing up and getting yelled at and escaping to the internet and fiction only to realize that it wont change anything. I wake up expecting everything to be the same as yesterday. And it is. Nothing new ever happens, besides my constant failure at everything. A different person would probably cry, but I'm past that now. I don't have any tears left. Oh, well, I better brace for being yelled at by my parents later...

glennmagusharvey

So what happens if you're forced to go to summer school but your parents won't pay for it?

Chagen

I have to do the grade over again. Isn't it like that all around the US?

glennmagusharvey

I don't know; I had my first taste of serious academic troubles in college.  Though, presumably, yes.

That does suck, though.  How much of a stigma is there attached to repeating a grade?

And how much does summer school cost?

I would offer to help you academically if it's worth anything.  I've tutored all levels of math, various science classes, and taught piano and music theory before.

Chagen

Academics aren't the problem. It's my work ethic. If I actually did the work, I could be in the top 50 of my school easily. But I don't do work. And brains mean nothing without something to show for it.

As for the stigma, repeating a grade basically means your an idiot or retard. I wouldn't be able to bear it myself.

FrodoGoofballCoTV

@Chagen: It's not the end of the world.  There are people that get into good colleges with a GED but they pretty much have to work their asses off.  I had to retake 1st grade, my senior year in college and a year of grad school but I never gave up completely.

 

I think the only way to succeed in life when you've screwed up multiple times as I have is just say "I don't care about what other people think.  I only care about my own life."

 

For me the hard part has always been realizing my life really is more important than the internet and other interests.

Chagen

It's not the end of the world.  

Maybe not for you...but for me...

I think the only way to succeed in life when you've screwed up multiple times as I have is just say "I don't care about what other people think.  I only care about my own life."

I'm kinda different: I live to impress and entertain people. I care about my life, of course, but I do things to impress other people and entertain them. I like to make people happy, and entertaining them makes them happy. It's why I make stories--I like to hear people say "I think your story was really cool!". I care about making myself look good.

ninjaclown

What grade are you in? Where I live, you fail a class you have the option of summer school or going to the lower level version of that class. Although, that may have changed since I graduated High School over two years ago.

DelusionalSunset

Chagen, are you at a private school? I've never heard of having to pay for Summer School, and I would know, I had to go pretty much every year, due to having a similar work ethic as you. I suggest working on improving that, by the way, and pronto. It will bite you in the ass and progress up to your head if you keep it up 'til college.

Chagen

No public. You have to pay for summer school. I guess only Texas does it like that.

 

Texas seems to do things differently. Everytime I talk about its school system, everyone's elses is completely different.

DelusionalSunset

Hrm, go figure. Do you have a friend who will pester you about making sure you've done and put in backpack and turned in your homework? That was one of the few things that kept me afloat.

FrodoGoofballCoTV

I live to impress and entertain people. I care about my life, of course, but I do things to impress other people and entertain them. I like to make people happy, and entertaining them makes them happy. It's why I make stories--I like to hear people say "I think your story was really cool!". I care about making myself look good.

Don't get me wrong.  I can't even enjoy a movie or a restaurant by myself because there's no point if one of us isn't taking the other one there to have a good time.

I hate my life.  It's completely pointless.  Escaping it is really the only thing that makes life worth living.

And yet escaping is even more pointless.  That's what I'm trying to say.  It's a tough lesson that I am struggling with.

Chagen

Sunset:The only such friend I have would be my Ipod. I have an app which I can enter homework into and it will give me alerts, but I don't use it very often. But now I'm making sure to use it more.

Bob

"It was my own choice to go on the computer guitily when I was supposed to be doing homework."

That's it. Chagen, (and I know you're not actually going to do this or even consider it for more than half a second, but hear me out) you need to give up the internet. I'm not talking indefinitely, I'm talking as long as you have to before you work this stuff out. Nearly half of your posts are either complaining about being addicted to the internet, complaining about not being able to access certain sites at certain times, messing something up due to the internet or being depressed due to something that happened on line. You're addicted and it's starting to ruin your life. Before you say anything, I'm not saying this due to anything other than wanting you to do better than what you are. I have a feeling I didn't word that last sentence right, but again, bear with me. Again, you're addicted, and addictions aren't good for your health or your life in general. If you're not willing to give it up, just try limiting yourself. Take up a hobby. Go out more. Read some nice books. Just do something else.

Chagen

My dad has not spoken to me since we got in the car.

Apparently I'm banned from my computer, PSP, and Ipod. Though he hasn't taken the last two yet.

And this worthless piece of shit cunt has refused to acknowledge that he may be partly responsible.

And my mom isn't here, so I have to suffer alone...

Bob

Maybe this is a good thing. This could be the first step to getting over your addiction.

While he probably is partly responsible, it won't help to blame anyone, including yourself. Just accept that you screwed up and resolve to do better instead of making such a big deal out of it.

Vorpy

Usoda no Chagen.

RedEyedAbyss

Let me put this in the most blunt way I can:

You're annoying.

Really, get off the computer and get stuff done!

Chagen

My parents just told me that if I fail one class thus year, just one, they will withdraw me from my school and intentionally place me in another one to seperate me from my friends and basically treat me like a slave.

Yeah.

Bob

-blatantly obviously sigh-

If you're not going to read any of the other posts, why continue coming back to the same thread?

RedEyedAbyss

Because what he wants is attention, not advice.

Chagen

I am reading the other posts, Bob.

The fact that my parents just said they were going to cause me as must emotional and psychological suffering as possible might be slightly important.

Abyss: Oh, fuck you.

Bob

You know what else might be slightly important? Trying to improve your situation instead of just bitching aimlessly and lashing out at everyone from your parents, the American school system, other posters and even yourself. You're in this situation for a reason, it's your responsibility to do something about it. It doesn't seem like it's too late, you could still probably pass your classes if you put some effort into it, do the work, lay off the internet for a while and ask your teachers what you could do to pass. I've been in this situation before, but did I complain about it? Well, that's not fair, because I did. A lot. But you know what? After I had a chance to bitch and moan, I picked myself up and actually did the work, as well as an assload of extra credit. I did whatever I could to pass, and it worked. Stop acting like such a victim all the time and apply yourself.

DelusionalSunset

With Bob on this Chagen. I passed high school a year late, and even then only by the seat of my pants. But buckling down is working is how to do it. Not bitching on the interwebs only.

Ponicalica

«The fact that my parents just said they were going to cause me as must emotional and psychological suffering as possible might be slightly important.»

Did they actually say this?  Like, literally?

Bob

It's Chagen, Poni. Do you really have to ask?

RedEyedAbyss

Besides, people say stuff they don't really mean all the time, especially when they're pissed.

Central Avenue

"You don't really mean you'll kill me, do you?"

Vorpy

I am actually sympathizing with Chagen's parents now.

An ungrateful child kid that never studies, that wastes all of his fucking time on the internet and whines endlessly and has a misguided fucked-up view on the world and can't seem to make friends (allegedly) has got to be embarrassing and a hellish burden.

Stormtroper

I assume it's not possible to take the tests (and credit for it) without actually taking the class?

Either way, Bob is completely right about this. This is important, do consider what people tell you, at least this one time.

Chagen

Finished all my homework..well, except math, but my calculator is broken right now.

Storm: I am taking everyone's advice. I do take everyone's advice. But I never act on it, I say I'll do better and then I'll just keep on doing whatever it was that I was doing.